Greg Kelly is a 43 year old news anchor currently the co-host of Good Day New York and previously was a White House correspondent for Fox News. He was just accused of rape. The survivor, a 30 year old woman who works in law, reported that they went out for drinks and that he raped her at her office. She also reported that she got pregnant from the assault and had an abortion.
Okay, so a couple of things you should know about me, if you don’t already. One: I worked as a therapist at a Rape Crisis Center for six years and part time for several years after that. I have also been an advocate in two different cities for survivors who have gone to the Sexual Assault Nurse Examiners (S.A.N.E.) Unit, meeting them there to provide support when they went for evidence collection. In my work over the years, I saw hundreds of men and women, though mostly women. I can confidently say I believe none of them were lying.
The second thing you should know is: I’m not into victim blaming.
So, I believe the woman who has accused Greg Kelly of rape. I do, however, want to make a prediction about this case- and I hope I’m wrong. I predict that nothing will happen to Greg Kelly for his actions and he may have some awkward moments to deal with, but this will all blow over and in a few years he’ll be back to life as if nothing ever happened. The woman who accused him will have to deal with the rape for the rest of her life and just as bad, the fact that it seemed that no one believed her.
I am not a fortune teller, palm reader, or mystic, so it’d be really cool if I am wrong, but let me lay out 5 reasons why I have come to this prediction:
1. It is a woman who is accusing him. Not shocking, but in this culture women are less likely to be believed. A patriarchy is set up with a man in charge, therefore everyone listens to men when they speak because unconsciously, we all know, they know the deal.
2. The way it is being reported will skew the story. Already one article I read, the headline is: “Greg Kelly claims ‘flirtatious’ text messages from rape accuser show their rendezvous was consensual and for a ‘sexual purpose,’ sources say.” Not the best title in my opinion, but it gets the point across. It gives us the idea that she is lying. They texted about sex, so it wasn’t rape. The news flash should be that you can say NO at any moment and if that isn’t respected, it’s rape.
3. He’s famous. She’s not. People love TV personalities. He has people who love him even though they don’t know him just because he’s on TV. They think they do know him and will say he could never do that.
4. His father is the NY Police Commissioner. The police say they are adjusting the investigation so that it is ethical and won’t be biased and that Dad’s position won’t get in the way of Greg’s case. They may be doing that, but in reality, even unconsciously, the police won’t be able to be unbiased because ‘Police Commissioner’ is a position of power and under Patriarchy, we are trained to defer to the powerful. The cops, even if they are trying to be neutral, won’t be able to because of the power difference between them and the Commissioner.
5. People are uneducated about rape and sexual assault. Investigators believe that text messaging between people about sex is permission for them to have sex at a later time. It’s not. An investigator told the Daily News yesterday, “Unless she taped the phone call, whether this guy gets charged could be determined by the texts.”
Linda Fairstein, former chief of the Manhattan DA’s sex crimes unit, said to the Daily News that prosecutors will have to think hard about bringing charges against Kelly. She’s the former chief, maybe because of comments like the following: “‘This woman doesn’t come close to establishing her physical helplessness,” said Fairstein, who said she has talked to sources investigating the allegations against Kelly, but not to prosecutors.'” NO means NO. If you are assaulted, do you want this person investigating your case? Hell to the NO.
All I can say is I hope my predictions are wrong.
Grrl Code: It is rare that people lie about being raped. Believe them. For rape survivors, if people don’t believe and support you, that betrayal that no one believed you when something horrible happened to you can make the rape that much harder to deal with. This is a rape culture where victims are not believed and are often blamed for their assault. Women, we must believe other women.